How mental health affects the way we view ourselves

The way that we view ourselves is made up of a bunch of smaller pieces of information. It’s our history, experiences, current environment, and our goals for the future. All those pieces form a framework. This is the lens by which we view ourselves and how we fit in the world.

Sometimes that lens can become distorted and we no longer see ourselves in a fair and balanced way. We might look around and see only the positives in other people, but when we look at ourselves, we only see those parts that we don’t like. That creates an unbalanced idea of who we are. We start focusing more on the things we don’t like to the exclusion of the things that we do like. When we look around at others, we may see qualities or traits in them and judge them as being better than the ones we possess. It’s an unbalanced perspective that can impact our mental health.

That imbalance can lead us to limiting the opportunities that we would normally pursue. Maybe you don’t feel like you’re good enough to go for a promotion at work, so you don’t even try. Later, that becomes something that you use as evidence in feeling like you didn’t deserve it in the first place. That builds on that narrative that you’re not good enough or you’re not worth it. Once that cycle begins, it can be hard to break.

Finding balance in how you view and understand yourself is the key. It’s okay to see the parts of yourself you’re not so thrilled with as well as acknowledge the parts of yourself that you love and find areas for growth. Together, that makes up who you are. Becoming the person you want to be should be met with balance for the times we don’t meet our own expectations.

A lot of people have a hard time understanding that mental health difficulties are something we all face from time to time. Issues can come up for all manner of reasons. Sometimes the reason is obvious, such as a major loss or a significant transition. Other times it’s not so clear where the issues come from. Perhaps they’re the result of things building up for a long period of time, and you can’t remember when it started. The important thing is to remember that all of us struggle occasionally, and it’s important to reach out and talk about it when you do.

Looking for a counselor can be a daunting undertaking. Luckily, there are many options. There are self-directed apps on your phone and support groups. Caregivers within Providence can access the behavioral health concierge program; it’s just a simple phone call to get connected with help. The most important thing is to start by saying, “I need help.” Remember, you’re not alone.